When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

Firstly of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Common issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there isn’t any denying that sober curiosity has elevated just lately. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final 12 months in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. Immediately we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however actually not the questions on what we will do if we’re fascinated by a sober (fully alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we method consuming as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I feel it’s a really private determination, however should you’re any sort of an everyday drinker (that means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the best way you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other method. Should you’re not consuming in the course of the week, however then consuming a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her e book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of selection for at the least 4 weeks offers clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely will not be attainable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any concept how shitty you actually really feel once you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It normally takes a couple of weeks to your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re now not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there concerns/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually depends upon what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to simply see should you might make it with out consuming for 30 days? Or had been you on the lookout for actual well being advantages? Or did you understand that your consuming has elevated over the previous few years and you recognize you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is de facto what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. Should you spend a variety of time bargaining with your self every time alcohol is concerned, which ends up in a variety of “guidelines” round your consuming, you would possibly need to take a step again.

You won’t even concentrate on these guidelines. They’ve simply develop into a part of your internal chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No consuming earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No onerous alcohol in the course of the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so on.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The top days of my consuming had been crammed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been always shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down each day, and that sort of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your consuming. You would possibly simply resolve that it’s now not price it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this considering “I don’t have an issue with my alcohol consumption however need to take a extra aware method to what I eat/drink,” what questions needs to be explored when fascinated by alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round consuming and the assumption that there are “drawback drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and life like, mannequin to make use of in terms of speaking about alcohol is the thought of consuming occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the thought of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The great thing about this mannequin is that you simply don’t have to hit any kind of a all-time low earlier than you may discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

Should you’re able to get trustworthy with the position alcohol performs in your life, I’d counsel sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested by your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to suppose. That is about you and the one life that you’ve, and whether or not or not you need a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does consuming align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this state of affairs?

Tam: What if our buddies have gone again to consuming after Dry January, however we are attempting to proceed. Do you’ve got options/suggestions for easy methods to make this a part of my life-style with my consuming buddies? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to search out new buddies – haha. However, significantly, if your pals really respect and assist you within the selections you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re regularly making an attempt to push you to begin consuming once more, whining that you simply’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila received’t do any hurt, then you definately would possibly have to rethink who you’re spending time with. It’s worthwhile to determine for your self what you need to do with the time that you’ve, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your buddy group is closely immersed in consuming tradition – that means most social actions revolve round alcohol – then you definately would possibly want to search out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to switch that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m probably the most fundamental sober individual round – and I’m pleased with consuming a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that folks have totally different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing slightly extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise available on the market – suppose flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually might go on and on. I’m regularly impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Complete Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle retailers are beginning to provide such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. Should you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s sort of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly need to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this 12 months and preserve a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam